


pining like the forest

by jumpman_sans



Category: Moominvalley (Cartoon 2019), Mumintroll | Moomins Series - Tove Jansson
Genre: (like 2.5 seconds of Ouchie and back to the fluff), Drabble, Fluff, M/M, One-Shot, Pining, also sorry im basically incapable of capitalizing things right, i made an ao3 to bookmark things but i might as well do Something while i’m here, it’s not relevant to this at all but snufkin trans die mad about it, very mild angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-08-03
Packaged: 2020-07-30 09:24:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20095003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jumpman_sans/pseuds/jumpman_sans
Summary: just another new spring for snufkin and moomintroll.





	pining like the forest

snufkin was trying very hard not to let the dreamy sigh welling up in his chest get free. the half-mymble’s foot tapped soundlessly in the air; he lay back against a mossy stump, arms folded behind his head and legs crossed lazily toward the stream. the shade of his hat was enough to hide a deep blush, which had bloomed like summer roses over his face.

the young boy lay in a small clearing, situated at the far end of the forest from Moomin Valley. the earth was spongy and damp beneath him, and he could feel the life beginning to seep back into his surroundings like watercolor on a fresh canvas. spring would be arriving soon, and snufkin knew he wasn’t far from the valley. in just a few days, he’d be returning to his friends; he’d be meeting dear moomintroll on the bridge. he pulled his hat a bit further down his face, feeling his cheeks heat up like leaves in sunlight.

of course, all snufkin’s effort toward concealing his current inclinations were rather pointless, as no other creatures lurked nearby to see him. but snufkin, always wanting to maintain composure, would still have felt embarrassed to be seen all flustered, even it were only in his own reflection.

and yet, despite his best efforts, the mumrik let out a sigh that sounded like spring breezes and buried his face deeper into the felt of his hat, for no matter how he tried, he couldn’t tear his thoughts away from a certain round and fuzzy someone whom he quite adored. he couldn’t admit it to himself, but inside his mind and heart he longed to gaze at those sparkling blue eyes, to feel those soft, warm arms embrace him joyfully, maybe even to slip his paw quietly into the other’s for a bit—

“moomin,” breathed snufkin, very quietly into the still-dewy morning air. but his voice, to him, still seemed a racket among the faint twittering of forest birds. his paw-like hands quickly scrambled to pull his hat over his mouth, as if doing so would muffle the already-spoken name. snufkin could feel the tips of his ears burning, and knew that he was likely as red as moominmamma’s sweet raspberry juice which awaited him upon his return.

after a moment of wide eyes darting about, the half-mymble relaxed and began to let his eyelids droop, hoping to sleep away his sudden fit of sentimentality there on the forest floor. he was eager to return — had he been more awake, the thought would have stunned him— but right now he thought maybe he could take just a catnap. an hour or two would not be so horrible a delay. slowly, snufkin dozed off amid the smell of cold moss and petrichor.

“snufkin!” moomintroll exclaimed, making his usual springtime sprint to meet snufkin at the bridge. snufkin smiled widely, and felt his heart swell and race to the time of moomin’s pattering feet. he felt so overjoyed to see his friend, and while any other year he might play it cool, today he just... he just.....

“moomin, my dear!” he heard himself cry out, voice full of exhiliration as he dropped his bag and fishing rod at the bridge and scampered to meet the other. snufkin streaked through the tall grasses and wildflowers, feeling the leaves tickle at his legs. his lungs struggled valiantly to keep a balance between breathing and laughing.

the two creatures nearly slammed into one another, but their embrace was so tight that neither one could fall. they spun around joyfully in the grass, ecstatic laughter echoing through the hills as their movements became a dance. for a minute or two, the world for them was nothing but joy, laughter, and the peace of being in each other’s arms.

eventually, the two ran out of breath and plopped down to sit on the grass, hands still intertwined, both of them gasping for breath between giggles.

“moomintroll,” snufkin breathed, “i think i have to tell you something.” moomintroll sucked in a breath and seemed to hold it with anticipation, blue eyes glittering like the sea which snufkin so adored.

“yes, snufkin?” he squeaked. snufkin felt his heart flutter like a butterfly at the sound of his name on the other’s lips. he smiled, and squeezed moomin’s paws gently.

“i think i love you,” he whispered, not looking away from the other. moomin gasped softly, eyes going wide.

snufkin felt something twinge in his stomach.

“snufkin, i... i- i don’t...” began moomintroll, but the world around them grew dark. 

enormous, churning, black clouds rolled into the skies of moomin valley, bringing forceful winds and rolls of thunder. a strong gust blew against them, nearly knocking snufkin back; he tried to grab his hat, but it flew away into the storm. he turned, wide-eyed, back to moomintroll, but his friend’s face was masked by deep shadows.

“i have to leave.” 

moomin stood up, turned around, and walked toward the storm, away from the valley. away from snufkin. the mumrik felt his heart shatter and he sat, dumbfounded, in the grass at the bottom of the hill. the rain had started and was beginning to soak through him, cold as ice.

a bird raced by his ear, riding the gusts of the storm which swallowed the valley whole.

snufkin was brought back to consciousness by the chirping of a small bird which had perched atop his hat to sing. his eyes blinked groggily, his mind slowly returning from the deep pools of his subconscious. his dream...

the boy sat bolt upright, hat falling to the ground. the bird chirped indignantly and flitted away. snufkin’s little heart raced and he clutched his scarf for comfort, trying and failing to steady his panicked breathing.

he felt wetness on his face. for a moment, he was mortified. had the storm been real? had moomin left him..? he touched his cheek, and looked up at the trees around him. no, the day was clear, and sunlight filtered into the clearing from between mighty trunks... he had cried.

snufkin’s stomach churned, as if a pit had suddenly opened inside him, threatening to swallow him up from the inside out. he squeezed his eyes shut and felt the excess tears roll down his face. a shaky exhalation, and the calm which snufkin tried so hard to maintain began slowly to return to him. once he felt well enough to stand, he did so, wiping his eyes on his scarf and picking up his hat and bag to head back for the valley.

after a two-days’ walk through the last stretch of forest, snufkin finally approached the breezy, tulip-freckled hills of moomin valley. through the thick redwood trunks and over the river, he could just barely make out the Moominhouse: a small stroke of blue and red perched just beyond the first hill. normally the mumrik would feel giddy and warm at the sight, but today the fluttering in his stomach held a darker tone. 

he so dearly hoped his dream was only a dream.

as snufkin approached the last trees of the forest, he pulled out his harmonica and blew out a few soft notes in an order he thought might sound nice. despite his yearly tradition of a new spring song, he had been so preoccupied the last few days that he’d hardly given this year’s song a half of a thought.

after playing aimlessly for a bit and concluding that he was surely fooling nobody, snufkin made a bit of a wild decision. he closed his eyes, steps becoming smaller for a moment as he focused, and he pulled from the depths of his heart a tune which he already knew.

moomintroll’s ears perked up before the rest of him could even rouse from sleep. he slowly rose up from the fog of hibernation, called by the sound of something familiar. the sound of a song, one which he already knew. 

that was strange. moomin found himself humming along perfectly, even before he fully processed the situation. snufkin never played an old spring tune unless asked....

“snufkin!” shouted moomintroll, his mind and body suddenly as awake as if he had drank two cups of coffee. as fast as lightning, the young moomin leapt out of bed and flung open his window, crawling with such enthusiasm down the rope ladder that he nearly slipped once or thrice. a not-quite-graceful landing followed, but it didn’t faze moomin one bit. the moment he’d hit the ground, he took off running for the river, leaving traces of fluffy white winter-fur on the blades of grass as he darted by.

snufkin continued on the home stretch of his journey, anxiously awaiting the sound of his name being called by—

“moomin!” he breathed, relieved to see the white dot that was his dear moomintroll making its way down the hill toward him. the song which he played swiftly left his lips, as all he could feel was joy that the moomins had not packed up and left. he pocketed his harmonica and started to trot toward the bridge.

however, snufkin was suddenly quite aware of himself. _they were never going to go anywhere,_ he reasoned. _you’re only being paranoid. there’s no reason to get all excited, so keep it cool._ he nodded to himself, slowing his step and tilting his hat down just a smidge.

_keep it cool._

at last, the two creatures’ paths met at the bridge over the stream. snufkin tried his best to maintain the aloof façade, but still, he couldn’t help but crack a small smile as he watched moomin tumble down the slope and trot up to the bridge, clearly a bit out of breath. when moomin looked up at snufkin, his blue eyes were full of light.

“snufkin! welcome back,” he panted, his words filled with energy despite his current state of exhaustion. 

snufkin’s smile perked up, his heart full of fondness... but he had to remember, keep it cool. so the mumrik tipped his hat, which had the bonus effect of hiding his eyes somewhat, leaned against the railing of the wooden bridge and replied simply,

“good to see you, moomintroll.” he hoped it didn’t sound too dismissive. he wanted to seem calm, not cold. thankfully, he caught a glimpse of moomin’s eyes crinkling up at the corners in what snufkin knew to be a smile, even when he couldn’t see the other’s mouth. he watched, just slightly amused, as moomintroll pulled himself upright and mirrored snufkin’s pose (or at least, that’s what snufkin had to assume his posture was. it looked a bit like he was about to cough).

“yes, it’s looking to be a pretty good spring so far, huh?” quipped moomintroll nonchalantly, pointedly looking around the valley, anywhere but snufkin’s gaze. 

the other simply had to keep from chuckling. moomintroll was so funny and so sweet, the way he liked to turn his mimicry of snufkin’s composure into a little game. the way that on the first day they had together, moomin would always gather the nicest blooms he found and weave them into a crown for snufkin’s hat. the way that even when snufkin wanted to be alone, it felt like each passing year made it easier to be alone with moomin....

“snufkin?” 

the words shook the mumrik out of his little daydream. he blinked, and as he found himself gazing back at a pair of blue eyes, he realized that he must have been caught staring. quickly, he pulled his hat over his eyes, hoping it was low enough to obscure the flush which would so often visit his cheeks lately. 

_nice job, _he reprimanded internally.

“yes, moomin?” he asked coolly, hoping the other would think he had imagined the staring, but his voice came out a few notes too high and he knew he’d given himself away.

“was there something on me...?” moomin inquired. snufkin knew his tone meant that he didn’t believe that was the truth, but that he also wasn’t certain of what was.

snufkin had to bite his lip to keep from answering with something quite sappy. instead, he looked out toward the stream, and said:

“no, i only got lost in thoughts for a moment. i was thinking maybe we could have fish for breakfast in the morning,” he lied, hoping it sounded true enough for moomin to believe.

a beat of silence followed, moomintroll’s curious eyes studying snufkin for a moment. the half-mymble swallowed nervously, quiet enough that maybe moomin would not hear. another moment passed, and moomin relaxed back onto the handrail, following snufkin’s gaze out over the river. snufkin did his best to mask a sigh of relief.

“yeah,” moomin said, sounding more like he was thinking aloud than replying to snufkin. “that does sound like a good idea.”

the soft, cool spring breeze twirled around the two creatures on the bridge, teasing tails and scarves and hats with its fluttering dance. the boys both gazed out at the valley, taking in the swaths of grassy fields and the silhouettes of the blue-grey mountains beyond. neither one spoke, for fear that this silence was just too important to break quite so soon. it was only after what felt like hours that snufkin finally spoke, his voice just barely louder than the gentle thrum of the valley around them.

“let’s go and catch tomorrow’s breakfast, then.”

**Author's Note:**

> edit: dang im glad yall liked my self indulgent nonsense hfkdjfhd


End file.
